And like a heroin-addled bat, he was gone

I spent two hours answering the phone, ribbing the clients affectionately before sending their calls off to different areas in the firm. It was like I couldn't get enough. I had to stop when Carol came back to her desk and demanded to know what the hell I was doing. I rejected the first fourteen answers that came to mind, and instead gave her a shrug, a wink, and a fingersnap. Then like a Carmelob, I scuttled away and strolled back across town to my office.

My dyspeptic boss tapped his foot in a hostile manner. He demanded to know where I had been. I rejected the first three answers that came to mind, and simply responded that I had been answering phones. Also I quit. It seemed the thing to do.

Explaining to my colleagues that I had just freed up a bit of time, I returned to Carol's office, where I found her rocking back and forth in the corner.

I turned off her light. It seemed the thing to do.